done / 12:35:00 PM

pfy is finally over. oral defense today went pretty well. and i thought i'll just pee in my pants, with just me facing 3 profs. but it was fine. i think they liked it, unless they were trying to be tactful. after today;s session it just reminded me, on how i need to remind myself to be confident with what i am doing and with myself.

and now its time to study for my only and final exam in this university.

dont really know if i should feel sad or happy that i'm graduating. pretty much a loner in school and doesnt help that i did my project alone. it wasnt a bad thing to do alone to be honest. but somehow in a way i feel that sense of exclusion cos its just me surviving on my own. roughing it out.

maybe independence is overrated. the hermit is trying to leave the shell but wonders whether the world will welcome the hermit. maybe the hermit just needs a thick shell.

off to states on may 4th. cant imagine that time really flies so fast. and i;m going to states like really soon. it'll be a good break, other than slogging out as hired labour in a theme park, to think about things and maybe explore job options. today's oral defense kinda inspired me. make a difference in sg radio he says. maybe. push the boundaries slowly he says rather than to me moulded into their style. maybe. i just have to keep this fire burning slowly.

but i think right now a good break from production may do me good in the future. never know.